I am feeling different. There could be and are a lot of reasons that I feel different, but I feel like I just need to say it here.
Things still feel very discombobulated amid the hopefully beginning of the end of the pandemic. That could also be applied to a life decision I made that I still haven’t blogged about. Eventually, it’ll be here.
Isolation is definitely hitting full force, and not necessarily isolation from people in general because I’m starting to hang out with some friends again, but not getting to meet new people at bars, games, or wherever.
It’s hard to think that I’ve missed a year of that. Right now, being single sucks.
I don’t have much to say today, but I do really like this photo (even unedited). Any way I edit it, I like it and I think that’s pretty important in appreciating your own art. I’m not forcing anything with it.
It is cold, people. We’re zooming through February and have landed at the coldest couple of weeks yet this winter. I love a good snowy vibe, but this time of year is always half crabby and half hopeful for the warmth on the horizon.
Which is next week, thank you mother nature. Another exciting thing coming up is the fact I can start working out like normal person again (the reason I ever stopped is a future blog post, so details don’t belong here—oops).
Unfortunately for now, things are feeling quite lonely and boring. In a normal, non-virus year, it’d feel like this, but the fact I’ve been isolating for almost a year on top of it helps nothing.
Living alone is great until it’s the only thing to do.
So for now, enjoy my cold view in a flim-y black and white vibe. It’s all I see these days.
Winter has felt strange this year. It’s been incredible mild (and filled with stress, but I’ll get into that later) and not too snowy. I do work from home now because of the pandemic—and hopefully farther into the future—so I don’t exactly go outside a lot. Definitely has something to do with the weird feeling.
Either way, I’m into that time of year where I wish for any kind of warmer weather, so for today’s photo, I chose something from fall a few years ago.
And heavily manipulated it to look like it’s from fall, haha.
The original photo was basically yellow, like everything was yellow. I brighten the water and turned it blue and deepened what variations in color I had. Pretty happy with how it turned out!
I have some ambition that popped out of nowhere, so I’m jumping on it. I want to start a project and since we are in the middle of this pandemic and going out and about isn’t key, I came up with this idea.
I will be going through the hundreds of unedited photos I have, editing some of them, and jotting down random thoughts. Hopefully, I will create a fun, low key little journey on here that will encourage my creativity (and maybe someone else’s).
This is me and somehow, I never chose to post this photo Instagram.
I weirdly had a body breakthrough this year. I used to judge myself pretty hard in photos and then suddenly—without even trying to—I wondered why I ever thought those photos looked bad. I do think that focusing on my mental health is the foundation of that change. I just didn’t expect it to happen.
Neglect is the theme of this blog this fall and now winter and I’m still not ready to figure it out. I do hope to create an actual plan and guide to keep myself consistent like I once was. I’m giving myself the entire winter to figure that one out.
Things are weighing on me pretty heavy right now and I’m not quite sure how to handle it. Frankly, I don’t even feel like that statement is true, but my body keeps telling me it is.
The next month is full and after it passes, I will be able to relax (and post a blog about all that happened because I guess it kind of is a big deal).
Other than that, I will leave this post quite short. I just wanted to say that I found a new way to edit my personal photos that I really, really, really like. I haven’t found that yet, so it’s pretty exciting.
Today, I’m sharing my simple way of using creativity to get out of that pesky rut.
This week was a bit of an off week. Even though when I look back, I was productive. I have only two chapters left of my “final, not final” manuscript edit and I ran two days for the first time in forever.
Still, I felt off. It’s Friday now and I have a fun lake weekend ahead of me, so I know I need to drop those feelings. To me that means being creative. Creativity equals relaxation in my mind.
I love finding quotes, photography, and writing inspiration on Pinterest. That is one of the most common things you will find me doing and one of the easiest ways for me to get out of my head.
So this morning, I searched for a good flower quote or something to title this post that related to my flower photography (something you can find more commonly littered on my Instagram).
Being creative is a simple thing. Most people overthink it. You don’t even need to create something tangible, just put yourself into a rabbit hole of Pinterest or Instagram, full of pretty pictures and words.
So, I haven’t been doing much of the creative writing part of my blog for a minute. Mostly because I’ve just been trying to figure out life, ya know? But also manuscript the only creative writing thing I felt like I could do was work on my book.
Naturally, I then avoided it at all times.
I have only been able to do one, two pages tops and this sounds maybe not that bad; however, I’m on the third “big edit” (adding in/smoothing out plot lines and character arcs), so I’m literally just re-typing most of it. I printed out the second big edit, made notes on it in a nice pink skinny sharpie with an obnoxious array of blue sticky notes to match, and now I’m re-typing it into Scrivener (holy, life saver program), so it shouldn’t realistically be that hard.
But, I mean, of course it is.
HOWEVER, a switch has been flipped and no, I have no idea why or how, but I currently have four chapters left after doing a chapter A DAY since last week.
I’m finally excited again.
After I finish, I get to read the book like a “normal” person (I say this with confidence even though I know that won’t happen) and send it to my momma, who really will read it like a normal person.
THEN, during that time, I will also be working on my first every query letter, synopsis, pitch, whatever else I need, etc. because we’re going to try and publish this baby.
I found some really nice articles to reference with examples and tips, but I have no idea what I’m doing. So if anyone has any advice, I’d be very grateful; however, I never know what I’m doing in life, so I’m going to do it anyway.
Thanks for reading! Here’s a vintage film preset edited photo of me I found from last fall that I’m including for no other reason than I like it.
It’s been a minute again. Mostly because 2020 is proving to be quite a challenge.
I live in Saint Paul, MN—next to Minneapolis, where the Black Lives Matter protests began again following George Floyd’s murder by a cop.
I’m white and grew up very far removed from the life of racism.
The past couple weeks have been full of tension and shame. I’m not sure what to do. Based off social media, it’s one thing or another that I’m supposed to be doing and can quickly become a rabbit hole of tips that blend together by the end.
I do want to help though, so here are some things I plan to implement into daily life beyond the trends on social media.
Listen to Black history podcasts or audio books
Buy books on Black history or fiction books by Black authors
Replace some regularly purchased items with items from Black-owned businesses
Sign petitions, donate when I can, follow Black leadership/change organizations on social media to stay aware of how I can help
That’s the starting place for me, I think—education. I want to work towards a balance between posting fun photography and stories and doing my part in regards to supporting Black lives.
Things are already changing here in MN and all over. It feels real. My eyes are definitely open and I’m aware my journey to support needs to continue and develop. Please drop any suggestions down below that you may be doing to help!